In the line at the cafeteria…
Girl: I’m reading a very interesting book on male/female sexuality right now.
Guy (obviously bored): Uh-huh…
Girl: Anyway… the author says that the chemical make-up of the male brain is totally different from that of the female brain, and that a woman’s brain contains about 10 times more white matter related to general intelligence than a man’s…. [stops talking]
(Annoyed) You know, I don’t think you’ve listened to a word I’ve said in the last two minutes. You are probably only thinking about the beer in your fridge and some girl you met in a bar last week whom you want to have sex with.
Guy: Huh? All I heard was beer and sex.… the rest flew past me like fire engines on their way to a crash site.
Girl (perplexed): Yeah, I can hear the echo of their sirens bouncing around in your skull.
Guy: Are you saying I have a one-track mind?
Girl: Yes, and there are 2 only stops… Beerville and Sextopia.
Was the guy you?
Doh! Beerville and Sextopia are only the two most significant cities on the planet. Grrr!
I would’ve have asked her to elaborate more on the girl in the bar. Since she brought it up, we might as well go the full distance.
That is so true though. When my friend isn’t listening to me I through in the words “sex” “girl on girl action” and “beer” just to bring his attention back to me. Works a treat.
However sometimes I think he thinks I’m going to strip, get it on with a girl and pour beer all over ourselves …
And of course the best word to get the attention always is
BOOBS
And suddenly ever guy in the near vacinity to listening to you
this kind of books are dangerous to women — some of them – pardon! – us take them too seriously.
when it looks that I’m losing my boyfriend’s attention, I say ‘blowjob’ and, just like that, he’s back! even more alert than before, trying to figure out his chances to get one.
outofctrl: I am always the guy in the convo… especially when when it is about sex or something equally dubious.
IB: I like your thinking. The ref to the girl in the bar is just one f the many random comments she makes. No doubt to to fish and to get a reaction of some sorts. I am beyond playing along and doing what is expected of me!
Miss M: All of those would get my undivided attention. I am a simpleton, and I know it. LOL.
Euro: Welcome back from your extended Euro trip! Blowjob is the magic word isn’t it? Pity that very little happens beyond that point.
Most men are, the ones who say otherwise are either deluding themselves or gay
10x less white matter puts us at a distinct disadvantage. But is that necessarily a bad thing?
Wait… I can hear the sirens of fire-engines too. The noise is deafening. There must be an emergency in Sextopia.
Mmmmmm, magic words. Maybe we should start a list or something? You could probably add some sports words too, like rugby or cricket…
Miss M: Well, if you are gay, you probably have your own set of “magic” words. Having said that , I can see beer and sex fitting in there quite nicely.
Guido: An emergency in Sextopia? Must be because you came to town?
She lost me at white matter. When I think of the brain, gray matter comes to mind immediately. Apparently white matter is as important, which would account for the Homer Simpson-esque response.
Del: Ha! Sounds like a plan. Sport words are a definite. In fact, after beer and sex, sport is in my top 3.
That could have been me.
I really enjoy reading your blog.
I’ve seen that work on some women too, sometimes even with the same words.
Wine and sex works for me. I think I’d feel threatened if a guy starts spewing stuff about brain matter, unless he’s gay of course.
Interesting useless fact of the day, women do in fact not talk more than men do.
Jim: Welcome to the club, brother.
Bunny: But women are a lot more discreet about these things, aren’t they? Mind you, call out “Sale” in a room full of women and I bet you there will be a stampede.
Esther: Guys don’t talk abut brain matter. Sometimes we arent even aware that we have brains… hehehe.
Wine and sex… nice!